Til I Collapse

"Cause sometimes you feel tired,
feel weak, and when you feel weak, you feel like you wanna just give up.
But you gotta search within you, you gotta find that inner strength
and just pull that shit out of you and get that motivation to not give up
and not be a quitter, no matter how bad you wanna just fall flat on your face and collapse."

I had such a hard workout. But not hard in the sense that it was anything out of the usual routine: 1 hour run, 30 minute abs/stretches, 30 minute swim. Hard in the sense that my body was revolting against me, probably because I did a really bad job at eating breakfast today. So I forgot my spoon for my oatmeal and I was not about to use my hands after touching the computer keys and swiping people's cards. So that leaves me with some hard boiled eggs and the peanut butter sandwich...definitely not enough carbs there to do an hour run.

I was about 15 minutes in when I became acutely aware of the pain in my lower calf but I wasn't willing to give up. I fought through the hour run, increasing and decreasing speed as I felt bursts of energy and fatigue. The last 5 minutes of my run though I got a second wind. Em's "Til I Collapse" started playing in my headphones and I jacked my speed up to a 6.0 and finished the run feeling really accomplished, despite the psychological battle that was going on internally.

I'm thinking that this is going to happen to me a lot throughout my training. That little voice in your head that tells you to quit, but being able to work through it is what strength is all about.

I pushed through my abs and my swim was lagging, I could feel it. But I finished. I went home and passed out for 2 hours but it was all worth it to know that for once I had won the battle of mind versus body. And then I collapsed, only to rebuild tomorrow :)